Life change begins with the conviction of sin
The other day I went up to my bed in the middle of the afternoon, put on some soft worship music and asked the Lord to reveal why I was saying, “yes” to so many things. I serve at church, in the community, I volunteer with non-profit groups, all while still having a full-time job, full-time family, full-time laundry, and the start of full-time migraines. I rarely say “NO” to invitations for help. I want to be all things to all people. Truth, I thought my motives were pure and altruistic, but suddenly I felt the weight of exhaustion. God began to reveal that my busyness stemmed from putting other things before time with him.
When I was willing to see my busyness for what it was: pride, then the Lord was finally able to begin dealing with me. The Word tells us that the heart is deceitful above all things (Jer. 17:9); but, we can pray as the Psalmist did and ask God to search us, know us, and reveal any sin in us (Ps. 139). Then, He is Faithful to do so. Amy Carmichael writes in her book “IF”:
“The searchlight of The Spirit discovers us to ourselves, and such a discovery leaves us appalled.
But the Light is not turned on to rob us of our hope. There is a lifting up. If only we desire to be purged from self with it’s entangling nets, its subtleties, its disguises….
Love is pressing on all sides like air. Cease to resist, and instantly Love takes possession.”
That afternoon I suddenly understood exactly what she had written. I was appalled as I truly stopped to be still and look at my life; I felt the Spirit lift me and as the tears rolled down and His Love rushed in. I hate to grieve the One who is nothing but good.
Jesus Christ is our Prince of Peace and if we observe him in the Gospels we will see that he is never hurried, frazzled or rushed. If I am to be like Christ then I must repent and step away from putting other things before him. It is only in his presence that we, you and I will become more like him, maybe someday, princesses of peace!
-M
